don't try this at home

As you may or may not know, I went to comedy club the other night. While most of the comedians were not particularly funny, I heard some new phrases that I wanted to test-drive, since, let's face it "are you shitting in my purse?" is getting a little old.

Last night I had the perfect opportunity at a silly drunk party on a houseboat moored near Canary Wharf. I selected the drunkest guy at the party and I approached him and initiated a banal conversation. Then, I interupted him with, "you know, you have exactly what my Grandmammy used to call a five cock mouth."

I am not sure the reaction I was expecting, but he did not respond well and I made a quick exit. My results thus far have been pretty inconclusive and I will probably need to collect some more data. It may be the perfect way to start a fight. I just got called a crazy bitch, but I am sure I could have gotten him to punch me if I had put a bit more effort into it. Maybe seven cocks next time?