a reply (crosswalk gets it)

Number of times I have been drunk in the last week: 5
Percentage of those times that alcohol was consumed at school: 80
Average number of hours I spend at work per day: 11
Ratio of working hours to daydreaming hours: 3:1
Number of books I've read in last 7 days: 4
Number of bottles of Johnny Walker Black Label I have polished off: 3
Number of times a week I consider running away: 14
Likelihood that I will see my best friend before I graduate: 25%
Number of people in Montreal that I phone in a given day: 1
Chances that that person is my boss: 100%
Number of people in Montreal that I text in a given day: 1
Number of people in London that I text in a given day: 2
Number of times I've promised my mother in the past 6 weeks that I'd go home the next weekend: 2
Number of days that tuition is overdue: 10
Amount I would have to drink to make out with someone in Montreal who wasn't my boss: two assloads
Number of people with whom that is even remotely appealing: 2
Chances that those people are in the same class with me: 100%
Percentage of those people who are attracted to girls: 50%
Chances that if given the choice and the right amount of hooch I'd hit on the gay one: 100%
Likelihood of me getting done this week all that needs to get done: 10%
Amount of time I will spend emailing: twice as much as usual